Quarantined, “Locked in the Bathroom” Edition.

Let me set the scene.

A young family lives in an older home with many of the original features - for example - doors/knobs, which periodically fall off. Typically the dad just busts out his trusty toolkit and puts them back on. TYPICALLY. But today....he hadn’t gotten around to it yet.

So, it’s around noon. Dad puts his headphones in, and settles into an estimated 1.5 hr long virtual work presentation, downstairs. Mom has only one mission - keep the kids quiet. Her bright idea? Midday bubble bath, upstairs. She gets everyone in the tub, then slams the door shut to further slaughter her one job of, “noise restriction”. Mom proceeds to get cellphone to turn on the appropriate bath time tunes, and quickly realizes that her phone is on 1%... “Let me run downstairs for my charger before the presentation starts.” she thinks. She reaches for the door knob. But... yes, that’s right.... there is no doorknob. And thus begins the saga of 3 Berries trapped in the bathroom.

Dad can’t hear them. Mom can’t text him, because her phone is now dead. Mom can’t yell because she’ll ruin the presentation.

Her thoughts, “How long can I keep these kids in the tub?” ...”No diapers for the little fat one in here.” ...”At least we can pee.”Mom quietly scolds herself. Usually, she’s prepared for anything.

Skinned knees? Bandages on deck.

Disasters? She’s had a legit Bug-out bag since ‘03.

Blowout diapers in the mall? She got something for that too.

So she began devising a quick plan of escape.

1. Running and throwing her body against the door.

2. Wrapping a blowdryer cord around the double lock and pulling

3. Trying to turn double lock by sandwiching it between a ruler (First born son likes to measure things) and tube of deodorant. Ruler starts to crack, First born screams out, “not my ruler! Save my ruler!” So, no luck. The ruler must come first. Nothing works.

Mom is quickly loosing hope. She peers through the tiny doorknob hole and whisper yells, “Hellllppppp.....” but nothing. Dad can’t hear her. He’s knee deep in presentation stuff.“What would Nancy Drew do?” Mom thinks to herself. Because she’s from the era where Nancy Drew, George, and Bess were the real situation fixers, far before Olivia Pope.

...The three Berrys will only survive for another 20 min before someone starts to scream anyway. So, Mom makes the hard decision...she must somehow get dad’s attention. She begins a steady stream of SOS knocks in Morse code. 3 loud quick knocks, 3 loud long paused knocks. “We’ll never get out!” yells First born. Second born has an eerie, “I just might poop right here, right now.” look on his face. But mom persists.

Her knuckle skin starts to peel away. But she keeps going.3 short, 3 long, ...she yells through the tiny hole again, “HELLLPPPP USSSS!!!” Finally Dad comes upstairs.They are saved! He uses his dad strength and somehow cracks the door open.“We thought we’d be in here forever!” Mom exclaims between tears of joy.“You almost were!” said dad...

“I kept hearing these strange knocks, but I thought it was the neighbors!”